“It’s Kind Of Like Drowning, Only To Know You Will Be Resuscitated” 

Do you remember the first time we saw each other outside of work? 

I brought you to the everlasting DIY venue, The Flux Capacitor.

You wore a green belly shirt and black puffy oversized parka.

I was so scared to touch your hand but I wanted make sure you were safe next to the pit. 

I failed. 

The tide pushed the bodies and you were slammed into the wall. 

I felt so bad.

But you took it like a champ.

That’s the first time I knew I loved you, yet was still scared to touch your hand.

This was the purest form of how we were or knew each other. 

Now we hate each other.

Well, I assume you hate me.

It’s hard to find hate in my memories. 

Yet I try to wash your name out of my mouth.

I will probably be losing moments of my life very soon. 

Like trying to write on a blackboard with a pen. 

Soon I will find myself doing push-ups as I think about this moment. 

Where have we come.

I am still a creator.

I am still to overcome a task of the relentless daytime tv of prison. 

And I will.

And I don’t care where you wind up, as long as you are happy and the kids are safe. 

I will keep this with me as something to pass the time and smile.

And cry.

If only words were made of clay, I would smash the mold and reform where we have come.

Mabye they’ll have clay in jail. 

-Joshua Tool 06/16/17

Two Birds

I’ve been washing my hands in the same sink for over two abortions now and can’t seem to rid the familiar film soft water stains on my skin

I’ve been chewing the ends of my pen for two marriages now

I  still can’t seem to scrape the red dye out of my raised fingerprints

See my father was a good man

He taught me that blood is just something that won’t stop

It will continue flowing and staining everything

We use it to mark birthdays on outdated calendars

In the process of age I’ve contemplated eating my vegetables and quitting dirty habits

I even got lost in a “To-Do” list the other day and then forgot to pick up my inner child from school

It’s okay, my father knew this would happen

She’s going to be staying at his house for a while

See my father was wise

My father was word

My father was bond

My father is dead

But he should be cherished

Because he is never coming back

His name is Jesus

Have you heard of him?